HEALTH & BEAUTY
Originally published on Monday, 10 November 2008
This Won’t Hurt A Bit
There is a certain word that can strike unparalleled fear into the heart of any man or woman on this Earth. It is more offensive than the worst expletive your filthy minds can conjure. It is a loathsome word: unremorseful and dripping with a terrifying sadism.
Okay, I’ll say it once. ‘Dentist’.
My last one (I refuse to write it again) was perched atop a dodgy solicitors, with a malodorous receptionist, a stack of year old cheap mags, an aquarium of dead fish, and a trigger happy nurse with a mean case of the DTs. And that’s before we even get to the Master Sadist himself.
But that was over a decade ago, and – just as I haven’t dated anyone Swiss since ‘Old Crazy’ – I’ve avoided tooth-manglers since him. So if the new Covent Garden Dental Spa is managing to get a non-believer like me through its doors, then that’s got to be saying something.
Maybe it’s the soothing earth-tones, the mahogany-esque flooring, the lounge soundtrack. Maybe it’s the ochre-toned recovery room and the 15 minutes in the massage chair of glory that accompanies every visit. Or maybe it's Dr. Flora’s infinitely relaxing charm.
Sure her surgery chair still looks like a device of torture. But at least she’s not Swiss.
Covent Garden Dental Spa - now open
68a Neal St, WC2H 9PA - 020 7443 5225
Membership is £18 per month (which includes a whole bunch of visits and benefits) and the first 100 to sign-up will also receive free tooth-whitening.
