It takes a lot for me to get sick of tea - after all, a good brew is the solution to so many of life's problems.

However, just recently a trendy tea bandwagon has rolled into town and the brown stuff has started to become annoyingly ubiquitous. Tea bars, afternoon tea, tea travel packs... tea is the new Russell Brand!

So I'm starting the tea backlash right here. Let's just stick with teabags, semi-skimmed and the odd jammy dodger shall we? And the only tea-related social event to be seen at this summer is the good, old-fashioned tea dance.

Ok, so you won't be rubbing shoulders with the beautiful people but this is about fun and whirling around the dance floor like a maniac, not sleb-spotting, and the venues are way better than your average scuzzy nightclub.

The Greenwich Dance Academy (bear with us) hosts a traditional tea dance, complete with big band accompaniment (and, more importantly, cake) on the second Saturday of each month in the spectacular Borough Halls, while CEROC London are reinventing the tea dance by putting it on water, in the ballroom of the HMS President on the Embankment.